Sunday, October 3, 2010

Give Me The Beet, Boy

What do you do with 40 lbs. of potatoes and 30 lbs. of beets? Fry them, of course. Being as how we don’t have a root cellar, we opted for grease. Once upon a time, we had a good friend and pseudo-relative who worked for Frito-Lay. He said that once you tasted a chip fresh from the fryer, you’d never eat them from a bag again. I don’t know if that jingle would work for advertising, but I think he’s right. I’m imagining fresh chips with barbecue seasoning, ranch seasoning, rosemary, chipotle, maple... I may need a Fry Daddy. 70 lbs. total, you know.

Here’s what we had for lunch. Remember, I had to match the potato and beet chips. We had hot dogs and M&M’s. I’m calling it “protein” and “little chocolate pills of joy”. My sister hates M&M’s (plain). How can you hate M&M’s? They’re candy coated yumminess. I usually eat one at a time, but today I was downing them by the handfuls. I’m not sure how that fits into the “lose last 3 lbs. of baby fat” regimen, but maybe it’ll all go to muscle. If it does, if this sneaky new diet gives me abs that can crush walnuts, I’ll get M&M tattooed on my tummy. It’ll be so rock-solid that I might even wear a bikini to show off the tattoo. Although probably not, because no amount of muscle hides the pasty-whiteness of my constantly-covered-regions.

What would you do with 30 lbs. of beets?

5 comments:

BlueSkiesBreaking said...

How can I hate M&M's? Well when you've had Godiva Chocolate Gems, it's like the difference between a hamburger at McDonald's and a steak at Ditkas! And this is coming from a girl who didn't even LIKE chocolate until YOU introduced me to Godiva. When you taste the best, it's hard to resort to M&M's. Sorry sis. Oh and I don't like beets either so I will let you keep your 5 million lbs of beets.

Alecia said...

Are you referring to me as the hater of plain M&Ms because I do! The beet chips, however, look amazing. Do you think you can save the beets for when I come out in a month?

Jody England Hansen said...

Why are you showing me a picture of these luscious things when I won't be having carbs or fat for another 6 weeks!

Emily said...

I think The Beet Chips would be a good name for a band. What were you doing with all those tubers in the first place? Were your gardening eyes a little bigger than your tummy?

halsadick said...

I think you getting "M&M" tattooed on your stomach could be misinterpreted. I mean, you did like "8 Mile."