Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Joyful Noise

The sweet cherubs have spent the whole day whining and slamming doors. Please tell me boys don’t slam doors. I can’t handle much more door slamming.

Here’s a list of our activities for today so you can tell me what a cool mother I am.

5:45 AM--I’m awake and nursing the baby.

6:15--I sit with Swimmer One while she gets dressed, then hang out with her while she eats and waits for her ride to practice.

By 8:00 I have put ingredients in the bread machine for sugar sweet white bread, have made banana bread, and awakened 2 Sleeping Beauties with a song and gentle hair stroking. We’re out the door, on our way to get Finished with Swimming One. Sleeping Beauties eat bagels and cream cheese on the way.

By 9:00 I have distributed Swimmer and Sleeping Beauties at the rec. center where the Sleeping Beauties will become Swimming Beauties--they have lessons. I have taken our car pool kids to their various destinations and allowed them to listen to their favorite radio station, which happens to be hip-hop. I love hip-hop. But not at 8:45 AM.

9:45 we’re on our way home from swimming. Chores for the day: weeding, bedrooms (mom-clean, not shoved-under-the-bed clean), and either: cook dinner, sweep kitchen or book rescue (find hidden books and return them to their loving homes).

11:00 Lunch--cantaloupe and a slice of fresh sugar sweet bread.

1:00--Oldest Tween gets dropped off at a party, and Friend comes over to play with 7 year old .

3:00--Oldest gets picked up. All 4 girls get sunscreened, put in swimsuits and are given the run of the backyard. They make a swamp. Then a river. Then a lake. Right in front of the back door. I wave at them and tell them how impressive it is to use the rocking horse as a bridge. I laugh at their muddy bottoms, which they wave joyfully. But then tragedy strikes. 7 year old has the audacity to actually spray 11 year old with the hose. 11 year old has to scream and stomp inside, tracking mud along the way.

4:30--Remaining 3 girls want to come inside. So I tell them to hold still while I spray the sun-hardened mud off of them. Of course, this results in angst, tears and fuming. But I get over it and eventually allow them inside. Once the mud is off.

5:00--11 year refuses to ever speak to me again because I don’t love her. She knows this because I have, once again, asked her to clean her room. Something smells rotten. Could it be the moldy towels on the floor? Or the spilled can of juice? Or the dirty clothes shoved behind the bookcase? Or the bunny pee on the floor? I seriously consider calling CPS--maybe they could threaten her with a foster family if she doesn’t clean up the toxic dump which she calls a bedroom.

6:00--husband walks in. I hand him Baby and inform him that Oldest Moody One is in charge of dinner.

6:30--Oldest One gets out of the bathtub, in which she has deposited all of her mud without wiping it out, and toys with the idea of making dinner. Good thing her father is home or I might have taken myself out to eat and left the rest of the lot to fend for themselves.

7:00--We drive around looking for a lost cat. Not ours. If I had actually lost a cat, I would not look for it. Looking for lost pets is officially on my “Do Not Enjoy” list. Especially cats, who are much more clever than dogs when it comes to hide and seek.

8:00--All the girl-children are in bed.

9:00--They finally fall asleep. I hate Summer Solstice.

9:30 PM--I finally shower. You’re welcome.

10:30 PM--I’m in bed. Not asleep, of course, because it’s my night to listen for Sometimes Sleeps Through The Night.

4:30 AM--I’m awake and nursing Did Not Sleep Through The Night

6:15 AM--Husband wakes me up to ask me a question and if I had a knife, I would have stabbed his eyes out. I’m just that gentle and loving recently.

I really need some Prozac. Or Vicodin. Vicodin would work, too.


Jody said...

There is an over the counter pain killer sold in Canada that has codeine, caffeine and aspirin in it. I think this should be standard issue to mothers of kids and tweens.....and teens.....and young adults.....and adults. Hang in there. Call anytime of day or night, even at 4:30.

Barbara Bee said...

Reading your blog today takes me back to those years of madness and reminds me why I am now adrenal fatigued and copper toxic. We had fun visiting with you before Abby left:) I think you are super mom personified!!

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