Monday, November 3, 2008

One Step Beyond

Witness my rapid descent into madness. I lost a cell phone. I lost an Ipod. I lost another cell phone. All in a year. And then, this morning, I lost my keys.
‘That happens all the time,’ you say. Ah, but do you lose your keys in the 3 steps it takes to move from the front door to the car door?
I pulled the keys out of my purse, locked and shut the front door, used the remote to unlock the car door for the school-bound children, walked to the car, and no longer had the keys. I retraced my steps. No luck. I plowed through leaves. No keys. I searched every backpack, every inch of ground, even cleaned out the car. No keys. I pulled out my spare keys, only to discover that they unlock doors but don’t drive cars. I sent the kids scampering off to school on foot. I re-searched the ground. I re-searched the car. I crawled under the car. I walked around the yard. I went back inside and searched every inch of space by the door. I looked in my room, in the fridge, the pantry, the cabinets. No keys. I called Hal and told him to bring home a straight-jacket. I called BlueSkies and told her to reserve a spot for me at Bellevue. This lady had gone crazy. And, we needed milk. Never run out of milk and lose your keys when the baby wants a drink.
We walked to the store. 4 miles round-trip. We came home. An image appeared in my mind: my church bag, which I hadn’t touched since yesterday afternoon. It wouldn’t hurt to check.
And guess what I found? I was so certain I’d used my keys to unlock the car door—and I had. I’d used the spare keys. And then I’d dropped them back in my purse, zipped it up, and forgotten all about it by the time I got to the car.
And this, children, is why I don’t work with power tools.


buttercup said...

Wow! I had a near similar experience a few weeks ago. I took the kids to school in the morning and when I needed to go out again, I couldn't find them. I looked everywhere! Couldn't find them at all. Finally, I looked in my church bag which was in the bottom of my closet and there they were! Odd!

By the way your title reminded me of Migaloo's posts--The whole appropriate song thing..Of course since Migaloo doesn't seem to blog anymore, someone ought to use the idea!

The Stevens said...

this happens to me so often, you'd better tell blueskies to book me a room at bellevue right next to you.

BlueSkiesBreaking said...

I always knew you were going crazy. Now there's proof.